Top 10 Pinoys

Who do you think best represents the best of the best Pinoy around? Well, here's my Top 10.

1. Illegitimate leader Gloria Macapagal Arroyo--She's my number 1 Top 10 Pinoy. Because of her, we have 10 million Filipinos slaving themselves abroad, while she and her minions feast upon billions of hard-earned monies which these Pinoys sent. She's also credited for being the most unpopular and the most corrupt president we ever had. She created deep divisions among us so that we can't unite and oust her. And she instigated the worst on us that now, we can accept even worse situations because we have accepted that we are in deep shit anyway and it will not matter if we go even deeper into shit.

2. Former detainee Joseph Erap Estrada--Because of him, hundreds of artists now see themselves as potential leaders of this country. Thousands more go the showbiz route after abandoning their studies. Why complete college when you can't get a job? And when you do get one, its not enough to feed you. But, if you're a popular artist with political clout, chances are, you'll never get jailed. Or if you do get a decision to go to jail, you'll stay in a mansion and after six years, you'll get pardoned. What's so good about is, you'll get to run again after being deposed.

3. Former president Fidel V. Ramos--He's a nice guy. But the Constitution barred him from continuing to be a nice guy. Forget about PIA-AMARI. Forget about the centennial celebrations. Forget about those hundreds of millions of corrupt power deals. The nice things should be remembered, not the bad ones. Overall, the Ramos administration gave us that long peace and stability that we all want.

4. JocJoc Bolante--He reminds us that if you're crafty enough, you play your cards right and you get close to the power-that-be (mean: First Gentleman), you'll earn your stripes and your billions.

5. First Gentleman Jose Miguel Arroyo--The archangel's name is Michael. And I know many people bearing that name who's good and nice and not corrupt. FG redefined the name. As in nature, there's always an antithesis. There's always, always false angels.

6. Boxer Manny Pacquiao--He made movies that suck. He reminds us that if you get your millions, you need to waste it with a liaison with actresses and fighting cocks. You'll survive every shit they throw at you because you have rich friends around who'll give you a hole in Manila, tax-free, and you'll get around almost everything. Hey, you've rubbed shoulders with the president, yes?

7. TV Host Willie Revillame--He's a nice guy who lies. What's good about it, he does it everyday on national television, with children around. He peddles cheap tricks in a cheap show, reminding us that there'll never be a worst show that his.

8. Former COMELEC chair Ben Abalos--Abalos got away with US$ 50 million. Last word, he's now golfing almost everyday in Wack-Wack, with two different caddies in tow. Expecting another gullible foreign investor to get millions? Well, probably. The lesson we got from him is this--you'll be spared the rod, if you're dancing with the powers-that-be and if you know many secrets which these powers-that-be are willing to give you millions more just to keep you in retirement with your mouth shut.

9. Speaker Jose De Venecia--He's the most gullible person I have ever seen. He does'nt know if he's being bullshitted because he's been used to bullshitting others himself. In fact, he has perfected the science of bullshitting.

10. AFP Chief of Staff Esperon--Poor guy. He just want to be a professional soldier but ended up as a professional ass licker. He's due to retire on February 9 but I sensed that Arroyo wants him to lick her ass a little bit longer. So, come hell or high water, he'll be around to swat those little insects he call destabilizers. Hey, he needs to spend for the wife, right? He has'nt collected his due as yet.